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Vol 868 - Jan. 13, 2010 - Different Terror Threat Levels Around The World
Twice weekly E-letter - StrangeCosmos.com - 2 NEW WEBSITE ENHANCEMENTS! We have added two new features that you have been asking for. 1. Auto Image Centering - no need to scroll down and center the image anymore! 2. New Utility Bar on top right and bottom of each image page which allows direct connect to 12 POPULAR Social Networking and News sites - FaceBook - MySpace - Reddit - Twitter - Digg - Stumbleupon - Yahoo - Google. Now it's easier than ever to share and store your favorite images and jokes! ------------------------ Are you ready to review the Best Humor, Coolest Pix and Political Parody on the Internet? Get ready to jump into something "Strange!" ================================== Strange Quotes - Things You Shouldn't Do..... "Don't carry a grudge. While you're carrying the grudge, the other guy's out dancing." - Buddy Hackett "Don't get mad. Don't get even. Just get elected, then get even." - James Carville "Don't compromise yourself. You are all you've got." - Janis Joplin "Never attribute to malice what can adequately be explained by stupidity." - Nick Diamos "Never believe in mirrors or newspapers." - Tom Stoppard "Never drink black coffee at lunch; it will keep you awake all afternoon." - Jilly Cooper "Never purchase beauty products in a hardware store." - Miss Piggy ================================== Today's Featured Humor : -) - Different Terror Threat Levels Around The World The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved." Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross." The English have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies all but ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to a "Bloody Nuisance." The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was in 1588 when threatened by the Spanish Armada. The Scots raised their threat level from "Pissed Off" to "Let's get the Bastards" They don't have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years. The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide". The only two higher levels in France are "Collaborate" and "Surrender." The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France 's white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country's military capability. It's not only the French who are on a heightened level of alert. Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout loudly and excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides." The Germans also increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbor" and "Lose". Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual, and the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels. The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy. Americans meanwhile and as usual are carrying out pre-emptive strikes, on all of their allies, just in case. And in the southern hemisphere... New Zealand has also raised its security levels - from "baaa" to "BAAAA!". Due to continuing defense cutbacks (the air force being a squadron of spotty teenagers flying paper aeroplanes and the navy some toy boats in the Prime Minister's bath), New Zealand only has one more level of escalation, which is "I hope Australia will come and rescue us". Australia , meanwhile, has raised its security level from "No worries" to "She'll be right, mate". Three more escalation levels remain: "Crikey!', "I think we'll need to cancel the barbie this weekend" and "The barbie is canceled". So far no situation has ever warranted use of the final escalation level. Submitted by our Limey Pal John H. ================================== Most Popular - Parody - News - Pix ================================== STRANGE FARM FIELDS - FERTILE HILLTOPS - http://www.strangecollege.comcontent/item/159351.html STRANGE OLDE RUSSIAN STEAM LOCOMOTIVES - http://www.strangevacations.com/content/item/158473.html HAPPY TIMES IN CHINA - CLASS PICTURE! - SMILE! - http://www.strangeamericans.com/content/item/159288.html FLAMING TRUCK RACING FLIP! - http://www.strangeblondes.com/content/item/159622.html FLAMING WIND TURBINE FAIL! - http://www.strangefarmer.com/content/item/159623.html F-22 RAPTOR - BREAKING THE SOUND BARRIER! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/159624.html WWII - STRANGE WEAPONS - GERMAN GOLIATH TANK BUSTER ROBOTS - http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/content/item/158718.html STRANGE TRUCK SIGN - CHOCOLATE COVERED BACON ON A STICK - YUM! - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/content/item/159505.html AMAZING MOUNTAINS AND LAKES - PPS PRESENTATION - BEAUTIFUL MUSIC - http://www.strangefunvideos.com/content/item/159526.html STRANGE SKYDIVING DOG! - http://www.strangedangers.com/content/item/159617.html CRAZY SNOW DOG - GOES AFTER SNOW-BLOWER ! - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/159618.html CRAZY SKATEBOARD FLIP - AMAZING! - http://www.strangepersons.com/content/item/159619.html STRANGE TINY WATERMELON - 3 - http://www.strangebusiness.com/content/item/159554.html STRANGE SNOW VAN - 5 FOOT SNOW DRIFT ON TOP! - http://www.strangeracer.com/content/item/159621.html STRANGE BLAST DEVIL - SCARY! - http://www.strangecosmos.com/content/item/159590.html OLDE WORLD SPEED RECORD - RENAULT - BONNEVILLE SALT FLATS - http://www.strangevehicles.com/content/item/159620.html STRANGE DIVORCE CAKES - HAVE ANOTHER BEER DUDE! - http://www.strangesports.com/content/item/159561.html 2010 DETROIT AUTO SHOW - HIGHLIGHTS! - http://www.strangetravel.com/content/item/159625.html ================================== The Featured Pix Category This Week - SS - FOOTBALL - NFL - COLLEGE - STAR PLAYERS http://www.strangesports.com/content/category/100020_1.html ================================== The Top News Articles & Humor for the Week The Trucker and the Blonde Waitress - http://www.strangepolitics.com/content/item/159615.html Strange Facts and History - 1 - http://www.strangecelebrities.com/content/item/159387.html Celebrity Bra Sizes - http://www.strangemedical.com/content/item/120178.html Strange Definitions - http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/item/120163.html Strange Questions & Answers - http://www.strangegolf.com/content/item/119828.html Strange Things You Learn in College - http://www.strangezoo.com/content/item/119814.html ================================== The Featured New Category This Week - Jokes - ALL Kinds, Puns, Quotes, Slams http://www.strangemilitary.com/content/category/102_1.html ================================== Be Sure to Check Out All of the Recent New Additions at the "Strange" Family Websites New! --------------- NEW STRANGE WEBSITES!------------------- Old Pictures & Images - History - http://www.strangeoldepictures.com/ Farmers - Crops - Tractors - Farm Animals - http://www.strangefarmer.com/ Racing! - F1 - NASCAR - Dirt Bikes - http://www.strangeracer.com/ Blondes - Celebs - Models - Musicians - http:www.StrangeBlondes.com/ -----------NEW -------------New! ---------------New! ---------- Travel - Cruises - Destinations - http://www.strangetravel.com/ Kids - Teens - Moms - Parents - http://www.strangefunkidz.com/ Bad Bosses - Employees - Ads - http://www.strangebusiness.com/ Cops - Police - Criminals - Felons - http://www.strangepolice.com/ Weird and Goofy People - http://www.strangepersons.com/ All Your Favorite Folks- http://www.strangecelebrities.com/ Autos - Trucks - Nasty Accidents http://www.strangevehicles.com/ Hockey - Football - Soccer http://www.strangesports.com/ Troops - Jets - Warships - Tanks http://www.strangemilitary.com/ Pets - Dogs - Cats - Wild Animals http://www.strangezoo.com/ Politicians - Parodies - Liberals - NeoCons http://www.strangepolitics.com/ Hurricanes - Lightning – Tsunami’s - Dangers - Crashes http://www.strangedangers.com/ ========================== ********** This message printed on recyclable media*********** (Think about it!) 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